I Can't Possibly Be Wrong All the Time

It’s the first of June 2023, so I went through my social media feeds and grabbed all of the MicroStories I’d tweeted during the month of May. (Full disclosure, the last time I collected any of my flash fiction tweets was in May of 2022 – I did do some sporadic microstory tweeting during the interim before last month, but it was so sparse I have collected those random lonely stories and added to the ones I did tweet in May. I’ll try to do better.)

As a reminder, these represent story-essences composed using no more than 269 characters (so I could tweet them with the hashtag #MicroStory.)

Usually, I only tweet Science Fiction and Fantasy #MicroStories. May was no exception. I guess?

For really great #MicroStory action, please follow @MicroSFF, the Twitter account that inspired me to participate in this minimalist writing exercise. That feed puts out great science fiction and fantasy MicroStories all the time.

(I want to make it clear that @MicroSFF is *not* a Twitter account of mine. Their flash-fiction tweets are excellent. Mine are okay.)

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The royal wizard, at his wit’s end, visited his mentor.
“The queen has been distraught, and as you’re aware, her majesty’s health and disposition is literally reflected in the land, hence the poor harvests and flooding.”
“Did you tell the queen this? You fool!”
#MicroStory

It turned out that demons demanding a person’s soul in exchange for magical power wasn’t just transactional, it was practical. A soul tethers a person to the universe in a way that hobbles reality-breaking magic.
This is why robots are so excellent at sorcery.
#MicroStory

The long wars finished, the elves hung up their shields and returned to more peaceful pursuits.
Their ancient woodland was safe again, other than the darkest depths of the forest where they kept their one prize from the war – the last living orc, scrabbling in a maze.
#MicroStory

The brigands were happy with their hideout, a wizarding tower that had been built before the great collapse.
Folks were unlikely to come across it and it was warm and dry with spell-sustained amenities.
But it also had a demon landlord that expected long-overdue rent.
#MicroStory

Colony generation ships often had a single deck of colonists in cryogenic sleep, completely under the care of the ship – not the crew. These colonists were usually Libertarians, considered not ideally suited for decades of travel in a closed environment.
#MicroStory

The adventuring party had agreed to meet at dawn, prepared to trek out into the frontier.
The half-orc had shown up without supplies or weapons. He didn’t seem worried.
In his experience, food and weapons would make themselves available. Often at the same time.
#MicroStory

“The short saga is this: yon urchin killed yon warlock. Gone mad.”
“The urchin?”
“Warlock.”
“Warlocks usually can’t be killed. The lad used a magic sword?”
“The tavern fireplace poker.”
“Huh. Get him to the keep. We’ll tell the warlocks it was some tall barbarian.”
#MicroStory

“So, this is your first Peasants’ Revolt, eh?”
“I suppose so, I didn’t think about it that way. Isn’t this the first Peasant Revolt for most of us?”
“Not for Old Hobb. He’s survived three of them.”
“Three?”
“Mind you, he was on the king’s side those times.”
#MicroStory

As usual, I’d test the news feed through the AI model of my brain before uploading to my own head.
I didn’t mind news nudging my overall sentiment one way or the other, just not too extremely.
To maintain baseline, I’d pretty much have to omit op-eds before uploading.
#MicroStory

The Man Who Couldn’t Possibly Fit There crept out of a space he couldn’t possibly have fit in.
He knew he’d only have a few minutes before he might be detect-
A flashlight turned on, and he cursed.
The Man Who’d Been There The Whole Time had been there the whole time.
#MicroStory

All cities have some character or feel to them but this city was so ancient, it could only be considered evil.
The vast number of temples and chapels just emphasized the notion that only the attention of many gods was preventing something awful from spawning forth.
#MicroStory

While the household slept, the kindly toilet-paper elves restocked the home’s bathrooms with the necessary paper products.
It’s me. I’m the toilet-paper elves.
#MicroStory

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Thank you to everyone who reads and enjoys my small stories. I tweet flash-fiction at irregular (VERY IRREGULAR) intervals on my Twitter account, @patman23. At more regular intervals on Twitter, I’ll be talking about my weekend or television (one time it was mostly about Game of Thrones), or complaining about raking leaves off of my lawn.

Header picture is a screenshot from City of Heroes, a free-to-play superhero videogame. I exercise no rights whatsoever to that image, but the image is of a doppleganger of my favorite character, who is dying from the exertion of defeating a horde of evil dopplegangers. Pouring one out for my non-evil doppleganger. He did well.

Want to read my earlier MicroStory collections? I have my first three years’ worth of stories HERE and the second three years’ worth of stories HERE – I might need to put together another 3 year’s worth of microstories soon.

In general, I’m fine with anyone using the text of my MicroStories for non-commercial use. (Look how cute I am, thinking someone wants to make a t-shirt from one of my flash fiction bits. I say cute, but you can substitute in some other, more appropriate, adjective. I’m not the boss of you.)

© Patrick Sponaugle 2023 Some Rights Reserved